Avatar…

… because “Aliens Meets Dances With Wolves” is just too long.

A few weeks ago I cashed in my Aeroplan miles for, no not a trip to Hawaii, a gift card for…. wait for it……. ESSO… AND… yes there’s more… four movie tickets. Aren’t you just jealous? I used the first of the tickets tonight to go see Avatar. Yes, finally! Even with my pass I had to pay $3 since it was in 3D. Can you believe that after they charge you an extra $3 for a pair of 33¢ glasses they actually have the nerve to ask for them back after the movie. I just have to keep mine as a matter of principle.

Now just in case you have read my past movie reviews you might remember that I’m not a big fan of the current 3D fad but I must admit that Avatar would not have been the same without it. Avatar must be the most visually spectacular movie ever made. Still I hate wearing two pairs of glasses for nearly three hours and I still believe that the way the 3D glasses mess with your vision in order to produce the effect is not without a tradeoff in crispness, clarity and ease of viewing. It just feels like my eyes are working extra hard to compensate for the effect of the glasses. The claim that 3D movies make the experience more real doesn’t make sense to me because I don’t know about you but real life doesn’t look like I’m seeing it through a View-Master.

3D aside, Avatar is quite a good movie. If you consider the ground breaking imagery maybe it’s even a great movie. James Cameron sure does make ‘em big that’s for sure.

Another thing I’ve said before is that the most important thing for me in a movie is the story. The story of Avatar did often feel like a mix of Dances With Wolves, Aliens and The Matrix. I didn’t much care for the heavy handed left wing propaganda but it’s pretty much a given with Hollywood these days. If they don’t make you feel guilty about not living in a mud hut, driving a Prius and eating only locally grown, fair-trade, free-range, organic and humanely harvested vegetables then you just haven’t been paying attention.

Anyway on to the movie. Jake gets into his Avatar body and first thing you know he starts wandering off, an obvious sign that something bad will be happening shortly. Sure enough he runs into some kind of hammerhead hippo and other sundry baddies who then conveniently disappear for a very long time. Foreshadowing much?

Jake meets Neytiri, (she saves him from the hammerhead hippo etc.) the local alien hottie, and the frolicking in the trees begins. She teaches him the ways of her people, they fall in love and he basically becomes one of them. He even learns to ride a hippogriff but just when you think nothing could touch them way up there the Red Baron appears from out of the sun and gives them a good scare. Actually he was called something else, very hard to pronounce so I just thought of him as the Red Baron.

Did you notice that big scull the Navi had in their village looked like it could have belonged to one of the aliens in Aliens?

Eventually the inevitable battle between the nasty war mongering planet destroying and definitely non-Prius driving humans and the Navi begins. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that the humans whole purpose for visiting the Navi’s planet was to obtain the rare and very precious material called Unobtainium. Shirley you can’t be serious Mr. Cameron. You make the biggest movie of all time and the whole plot revolves around and mineral called Unobtanium. What were you thinking? Harry Potter had its Philosopher’s Stone, Star Trek had its Dilithium crystals, even the new Star Trek had its Red Matter…oh wait that’s even worse, never mind.

All kidding and complaining aside there is much to like about Avatar. And not just the extra awesome graphics. The story, though quite familiar is compelling. Combined with truly magnificent visuals Avatar is a rare movie experience and is definitely a highly entertaining escape. I give it 9/10.


BTW if you haven’t already I recommend getting a SCENE card (in Canada at least). It’s a loyalty rewards program that will basically get you a free movie after you’ve paid for ten and 10% off on concession prices. So that brings the price of your popcorn from “absolutely ludicrous” all the way down to “completely ridiculous”.