The Best Bar of Chocolate

Do you remember that chocolate bar you probably tried once or twice sometime during your childhood? Maybe you got a miniature one in your Halloween candy from some old person who just wasn’t “down with the kids” and didn’t know about all the current trendy candy they liked. You’ve probably never actually bought one yourself unless it happened to be part of a party pack, but thanks to the variety of experiences life does seem to inevitably provide, you have probably eaten a piece of one every now and then. You know, it’s the bar without any nuts, caramel, wafers, marshmallow, nougat or sprinkles of any kind. The plain one, so plain in fact that it comes in a mostly white wrapper with a simple unassuming name guaranteed not to draw attention and to nearly always be passed over for something more flashy, exotic or extreme. Have you guessed which one I’m talking about yet?

Yes it’s the Jersey Milk bar. On a hunch I bought one the other day, probably for the first time in decades. All I can say is WOW! Now that is some real quality milk chocolate. It’s a true chocolate bar, not a candy bar as they are often called these days. No need to disguise some cheap waxy chocolate flavoured imitation with other overbearing flavours. The Jersey Milk is simple yet obviously made of authentic high quality milk chocolate and is some of the best tasting, smoothest chocolate you can buy for less than a dollar.

In the olden days it came wrapped in gold foil with an outer white wrapper made of paper. Nowadays it has changed to a one piece plastic wrapper but has maintained the plain but elegant design of old. So after your kids come home Halloween night and you are sneaking through their bounty of goodies maybe pass over the Snickers, Oh Henry, Kit Kat and Wonderbars and see if you can’t find a mini Jersey Milk bar. I promise the kids won’t care or probably even notice if you help yourself to such a plainly wrapped and obviously boring bit of swag. Either that or you could just go buy one RIGHT NOW! Except those of you who don’t happen to reside in Canada of course. Yeah, unfortunately they are not available in the states. Sorry about that.

201 movies in 199 seconds

Yeah I know it's been a whole month since I last posted but due to my exciting life this is all I've got for you today. I know it's not much and pretty much pointless but you can at least take comfort in knowing that it took me several hours to make. Therefore I hope the 199 seconds required to watch it may seem at least partially justified.

The music in the clip is by Vanessa Mae, yes that very same Vanessa you met in my last post. The song is called Contradanza in case you are interested.

The video consists of movie still shots each lasting just under one second in the video. ( I tried to match the timing of the shots to the beat of the music but Windows movie maker doesn't provide quite that level of control so it is what it is.)

These are still shots from most of my favourite movies and many others that I consider well above average. I hope you recognize many of them. I would be very surprised if anyone could match every still with its movie as I'm pretty sure there are at least a few that none of you has ever seen. Maybe someone will prove me wrong. I hope so.

Maybe in the comments you could tell me how many of the photos you were able to match to a movie and we can see who gets the most. If anyone gets them all I promise to address you as "Master and Commander" all the rest of my days. (Yes that is the name of one of the films in the video, so one down, only 200 more to go.)

If you recognize a photo but can't quite place it and it really bugs you and renders you utterly unable to think about anything else and get on with your day then please feel free to ask me.

So here they are, 201 movies in 199 seconds and some great music as well.

My Favourite Vanessa

Due to the recent sell off of much of my DVD collection as well as a few other things, I have had the chance to browse through my only slightly substantial CD collection as well. Since most of the songs I own on disc, at least my favourite ones, are now living in my iPod, I rarely find myself spinning the original discs at all anymore.

While sorting through my old collection I came upon one particular CD that I used to listen to over and over about 10 years ago. Although I don't listen to it nearly as much as I used to back then I still play it now and then. I'm fairly sure it's one that most of you have never heard of. The artist's name is Vanessa Mae and the album is called Storm. One song in particular, I'm a Doun, is the one I really loved.

If you don't mind, please click on the play button and listen to I'm a Doun now before you read on further. Although there are no lyrics, except for a short poem she sings at the beginning, maybe see if you can tell what it's about.

I'm a Doun by Vanessa Mae




I had never heard of her either until one day, back in 1998, I returned home from a long day of work, plopped down on the couch and turned on the TV. Apparently I had left it on the "Bravo" channel the day before so that is what came on again. A program called Bravo Videos was on and a video of a pretty violin player had just begun. I missed the title and the few lines of singing at the beginning and saw her just begin to play her violin. Although there were no more lyrics to listen to, only Vanessa playing her violin and a couple of obviously out of place yet somehow perfectly appropriate dancers to watch and listen to I felt I knew exactly what the song was about. The violin music seemed so full of longing and despair it surely must represent a lonely girl longing for the unlikely return of her love who has left her and gone far away. The exotic sounding drums, voices and dancers are from a far away land and represent everything that is keeping her love from her and preventing his return.

Her violin starts out softly and slowly but as the sounds of the distant land get louder her violin also gets bolder, higher, more determined yet somehow even more tragic as the duel of opposing forces intensifies and she becomes more desperate and fights ever harder to bring him back. In the end I like to think her violin perhaps wins out over the exotic drums and voices but maybe that's just wishful thinking.

I will admit that I had, only months before, watched the love of my life walk away never to return so to say that I identified with this song would be a severe understatement. That first time I saw and heard it it brought me to my knees but I loved it anyway for knowing what I was going through and expressing it so well, even without words. (I would rather not have mentioned this bit but I guess I had to for the whole thing to make sense.)

As the video ended the title and artist's name came up again so I was able to find out that critical information. I actually e-mailed the Bravo Videos program and asked them if they would let me know when they would be playing that video again because I just HAD to have it. (It wasn't on the YouTube back then.) Surprisingly the man in charge of the program actually replied and did let me know the next time they would play it so I was able to get a VHS copy of it. I couldn't find the CD in any store so I made my very first online purchase and the Storm CD arrived a few days later. I would almost be embarrassed to admit how much I listened to it over the next several months and to this day it remains one of my favourite albums.

The Title comes from the short poem she sings at the beginning. It's in old Celtic English so here it is with a rough translation.

I'm o' doun, doun, doun,
I'm doun for lack o' Johnnie.
Gin Johnnie kent I was na weel,
I'm sure he would come to me;
But o, gin he's forsaken me,
Och hone! what will come o' me!

I am sad, sad, sad
I am sad for lack of Johnnie
If Johnnie knew that I was not well
I'm sure he would come to me
But o, since he's forsaken me
Oh now what will become of me

Finally, here it is, the video that I just happened to catch one day so many years ago and I'm so glad I did. It's dedicated to anyone who has ever had to watch the one they really truly loved... walk away never to return.

Those Joyful and Cloudless 80s

Today was the last day of what is universally recognized as the best month of the year, July. Here in Smallville it was a bright sunny day, a perfect marker for the middle of summer.

In celebration of this the supreme season of the year and another perfect but final day of July, won’t you join me in remembering an extra awesome summer song from those joyful and cloudless 80s. It was the biggest solo hit for the not quite as famous as Belinda Carlisle but most talented member of the Go-Go’s, Jane Wiedlin. I hope you remember it. It’s a really fun and sunny song; especially recommended for those top-down, windows-open, hand-surfing-the-wind drives on joyful and cloudless summer days.

Rush Hour by Jane Wiedlin



P.S. Can also be used to brighten, by at least three shades guaranteed, dull and dreary days as well.

Nines and Eights

Today while driving I was listening to music from my iPod which was connected to my car stereo. I had it set to “shuffle” so the songs play randomly and I never know which of the 744 songs currently living inside my nano™ will start up next. The display on the stereo keeps a count of the number of songs which have played since being set to shuffle. Track number 98 was just ending so the display next showed “Track 99” and then the song title was to come up. The word track disappeared but “99” was still being displayed. At first I thought something was wrong and wondered why the title wasn’t coming up. As the softly starting song gradually got louder I finally recognized it and figured out that there was nothing wrong with the display because track 99 was indeed 99. I wonder what the odds of that happening were. Probably about 744 to 1 actually, but somehow they seem much lower than that even, don’t you think?

For you young’ens who ain’t never heard the song and think Toto only makes toilets maybe you could go to the YouTube and check it out. Actually never mind, here it is. Yes, it’s those “Africa” dudes again but that is just coincidence, or maybe it isn’t… Hmmmmm…



Shortly after that happened I noticed my odometer was soon to blow through 88,888 kms… Okay okay, so it was really 188,888 but still another rare aligning of numbers right? Did you know that the number 8 is considered a lucky number in China?

So anyway, that was my excitement for the day. I can’t believe I’m even going to post this!

Someone once said,

“I would stay asleep my whole life if I could dream myself into a company of players.”

After seeing two different plays on two consecutive nights down at the local theatre I can definitely identify with that statement.

Thanks to some cool people who shall remain nameless (their initials are KJAMBD) I was lucky enough to come into two tickets to the local playhouse. And um… since all of my girlfriends are always so busy I ended up going solo…twice, and that’s all we’re going to say about that.

The first night I saw The Ark. Yes, that ark. I went to it first because one of my old friend’s daughter is in it. Sydnee Ralph is her name and just let me say she is brilliant! She has an awesome singing voice and quite a natural knack for acting as well. In fact, all of the actors are genuinely talented and the show is full of great singing and lots of comedy too. Noah’s wife even came into the audience and cut off a piece of my arm for food. (Hey I’ll do anything I can to help out.)

Tonight I went to another play in which liquid precipitation features prominently, Singing in the Rain. Yes it’s the very same story as the Gene Kelly movie. Besides the title song there were a few others that I recognized but just never knew where they originated. The dancing, although of course not at the Gene Kelly level, was impressive and significantly better than I was expecting. Overall another great and seriously funny show but maybe more for grownups than The Ark is.

The main point of this post though, is not meant to be a review of the plays so much as it is about the theatre itself. There is just something about a live performance by real people on a stage that a movie can never match. No matter how great the film there is always a distance and lack of intimacy that movies can never escape. Even with perfect visuals and sound and spectacular effects a movie always lies flat on the screen and when it’s over the screen is instantly blank and we realize that none of the characters who grabbed our hearts, made us laugh and made us care for them was ever really there.

The actors in a play however, are completely real and alive. Even in small town productions like the ones I was lucky enough to see there is an unmistakeable connection between the players and their audience that you can almost taste. Although they may be strangers when the curtain rises they become our friends by the time it falls. They allow us in, to witness the fruits of their talents and long hours of rehearsals and in return we show them our appreciation with our laughter and applause. Sure, in reality it is unlikely that we will ever see them again but for a few minutes we both occupy the same little world and we love them for building it for us.

Maybe the fact that my girlfriends are always busy and my going solo contributes to the connection I feel with the live actors on a stage. I suspect and hope though, that it’s not just me.

Someone once sang, “Players only love you when they’re playing.” Yeah, that’s probably true but I feel just a little more alive for those few minutes that they do.

Admittedly the high from the play is inevitably followed by a corresponding and shockingly immediate crash as I walk out into the night and fumble for my car keys. That’s okay though, it was so worth it.

Thanks for the tickets KJAMBD. I hope to go to more real shows from now on.

HP and the Half-Blood Prince

I had planned to see it eventually but thanks to some heads up advance tickets purchasing done by the Quintons and their inviting me to use an extra one, I was able to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince in a sold out theatre on only its second day of release. Thanks to Dennis, Leisel, TJ, Megan, Steve, Taylie and Spencer for letting me join you.

As it has a running time of 2 hours and 33 minutes it was easy to forgo the $12 popcorn and drink combo and just enjoy the movie knowing I wouldn’t be distracted by the need to “go” during the latter part and also that, for the rest of the night, I wouldn’t have that mildly nauseating and greasy on the inside feeling you get from consuming way too much popcorn topped with a silly amount of melted yellow chemical sludge. Now on to the movie…

The familiar main title in all its jagged glory opens the show as usual but the surprising absence of the even more familiar mood setting theme music was disappointing to say the least. I suppose it may have been a sign that this was going to be a departure from the traditional HP movie formula and it definitely was that, but in a good way this time.

In real estate they say the three most important things are location, location and location. Well for me in movies it’s all about story, story and story. This Potter movie is all about story. It may not be the exact story contained in the book but it is a good one and it’s told with purpose and passion, without stopping along the way to apologize for omitting this particular bit or that inconsequential character. Instead of trying to include tiny fragments of every bit of the book, as they have often done in the past, this time it seems they recognized the important elements and concentrated their efforts on the central story leaving many familiar faces with little more than cameos this time around. Sure it was unfortunate not to have more time with some of them but if the end result is a deeper much more meaty and involving tale then I’m all for it.

If I may now mention a few specifics, I’ll start with Daniel, Emma and Rupert. They of course play Harry, Hermione and Ron. These three have been together for so long now that it’s quite obvious they are genuinely comfortable working together. Although I must admit I had always hoped that it would be Harry and Hermione who would end up together, as their special bond is shown to and felt by us in this movie much more than in any of the previous ones. Daniel and Bonnie Wright (Ginny) unfortunately have about as much chemistry as a liberal arts major. Emma and Rupert on the other hand have fairly good chemistry and although they go through a rough patch Ron and Hermione are back together by the end and their reconciliation is quite sweet.

I had read that there was a lot of snogging (apparently it’s what they call kissing over there) in this movie but I was relieved to find much less than I had feared and that there is no real need to nickname this Harry Potter movie as “Hogwarts 90210” at all.

One more pleasant surprise was the amount of humour in HP 6. It is by far the most funny of all the films thus far. It’s not that they went out of their way trying to make a comedy at all. It doesn’t feel forced or fake, but they have done a great job including some good laughs along the way.

Quidditch is back for a brief but spectacular appearance. Although it has been good in the past it seems that this time they found someone who really understands the physics of motion and athletics to choreograph the flying and the play so it looks more realistic than ever.

This is also the creepiest and scariest of the films so far. There was one spot (obvious to anyone who has read the book and even to many who haven't) in particular where several of the girlies in the packed theatre let out some professional grade screams.

A couple of minor characters stood out to me and I must mention them.

Helena Bonham Carter makes an early appearance, as Bellatrix of course, and a couple more later on and I must say I wish she was on the good guy’s team. She absolutely steals every scene she is in and I find it nearly impossible to take my eyes off her. She has so much charisma and she is obviously one of the best actors in the film.

Evanna Lynch (Luna) is her usual quirky little self. She is no Alice Cullen but she is just a tiny bit the same type of character. A bit strange from afar but quite lovely once you get to know her.

Above all, this is Harry and professor Dumbledore’s story and they tell it well. For the first time I found myself not missing Richard Harris so much and it was spectacular to witness the full fury of Dumbledore’s legendary magical power used in anger to save Harry.

I will admit that the large gap of time from when I read the book until seeing the movie tonight may have something to do with my lack of disappointment due to bits of the book gone missing. Having said that, I must say that this HP movie is my favourite of them all and by quite a large margin. A somewhat concentrated and great story is well told. I was more involved, I cared more, I laughed more, I got more stuff in my eye, I was more afraid, I was sadder and I was happier. It's just a great ride. I think I'm ready to go again.

8 out of 10.

P.S. Just one more thing I intended but forgot to mention. To top it all off it was so nice to walk outside into the 9:30 twilight™ and find it still warmer than inside with a muggy but very pleasant humidity that reminded me of places on this planet humans were actually meant to inhabit… Like Hawaii or basically anywhere between the Tropics of Cancer and Capricorn.

Memories of Japan courtesy of Africa by way of Slovenia

I think/hope most of you are familiar with Toto’s song Africa. It was released in 1982 and became a number one hit early in 1983. This was just after I got to Japan on my mission.

It was of course a huge culture shock being in such a completely foreign land so anything familiar that reminded us of home was appreciated immensely. We were not allowed to listen to music on our own but that doesn’t mean that we never heard any. Music was often playing in many public places and much of the time it was western music (as in pop music from the English speaking world, not country/western.) As it was just becoming the number one hit worldwide “Africa” was one of the songs we heard most often. In fact one particular day in Japan is always brought back to me when I hear this song. The area we were serving in was having their stake “undokai” or sports day. Basically a track and field day/picnic type of affair. We were allowed to dress in our casual clothes and participate in the whole thing.

One of the members brought his portable music player (CDs were just barely coming out then so it would still have been what they called a “rajicase” or radio/cassette player.) The only song I still remember hearing that day was Africa and whenever I hear it now I remember that sports day in Sakai, Japan.

Completely by chance I came across this cool version of the song on the YouTube. It is an a cappella version done by a Slovenian choir. It starts off with a very cool rain/thunder storm. I have also included the original version by Toto just for comparison in case you need to refresh your memory.

(listening through headphones highly recommended)

One afterthought if I may, I think it would be coolest if you listened with your eyes closed, from the beginning through the rain/storm part up until they start singing. Then open your eyes and restart it so you can see just how they made it rain and thunder.

Up - by Pixar

Minor spoilers only.

Just like the house in the movie, Up has a promising lift off but soon loses altitude and drags its way to the end. It’s actually a pretty good movie, but story wise, it’s just not up to Pixar’s usual high standards.

I have seen all but one (A Bug's Life) of Pixar’s feature films and I must say that Up lands firmly at the bottom of my favourite Pixar movies list. In fact, just so you know where I stand, here is my list from best to merely somewhat spectacular Pixar movies.

The Incredibles
Toy Story
Toy Story 2
Monsters Inc.
Finding Nemo
Cars
WALL-E
Ratatouille
Up

It is of course visually stunning. Pixar only keeps getting better in that department. Although I must point out that I’m not a big fan of the current 3D fad. I don’t think it adds much to the experience and in fact detracts by causing eye strain and washing out the colors slightly, as would happen if you watched wearing mildly tinted sunglasses. It also distracts by jolting you out of the story every time the 3D kicks in and it’s like the film makers suddenly shouting “hey look what we can do.” Anyway, on to my next nit to pick.

I believe that the line separating movies which are genuine and honestly moving and those that are plainly emotionally manipulative can often be very thin. To me, for the first time, Pixar crosses the line from the side of honestly moving to emotionally manipulative. This is not because the moving aspects of the story were too extreme or unbelievable, but because those elements were literally left hanging out on their own by a story that provided little else in the way of engaging plot, serious adventure, real excitement and that all important movie magic.

The actual adventure part of the movie is the least compelling and drags the movie down the most. Comedy wise there are a few laughs but far fewer than we’re used to in a Pixar movie. The most prominent and unfortunately most over used gag in the story is facilitated by dogs who wear collars which translate their barking into human language. The first few times we hear it is cute and funny but it gets old pretty quickly.

Another bit, which I first thought could be at best a slight diversion part way into the story (it involves a rare big bird), turns out to be the main focus of all the action and was thus disappointing.

By the time it’s over we’ve learned nothing new, been treated to tired old inspirational clichés and are left wondering why we had to go through all that merely to be reminded of a few lines of greeting card poetry.

Looking back, it seems quite obvious to me that they started out with the sob story first then tried to write the rest of the movie around it. Didn’t quite work for me.

Just like the house in the movie, Up lands exactly where it intends to in the beginning. And just like the house in the movie, the ride involves much more dragging and much less soaring than I had hoped.

It has the scenes to make you cry, it just doesn’t have the scenes to make you care.

6/10 for me.


P.S. Most people are gushing over this movie so you may well love it as well. It just seemed a little lacking to me.

Virtual Treasure Hunt 2

It's that time again folks, time for another virtual treasure hunt using a movie and Google Earth. If you'd like to play this time the movie you'll get to watch is Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Wait, don't click away to Facebook just yet, just hear me out on this.

I remember seeing CCBB as a young kid but I'm not quite sure if I saw it in the theater or on TV. Until seeing it again a couple of days ago I didn't remember much of the story, only that it made a big impact on me when I saw it as a child.

When I watched it again a few days ago it struck me how different it is from movies that come out these days. The two main kids in the movie especially were quite a shock. Instead of the eye rolling, know it all, wiser than every adult, ungrateful, cynical and sarcastic brats that inhabit every screen these days, the kids in CCBB are respectful and sweet. I kept waiting for them to produce some attitude but they never did. I can't say why exactly but that one aspect was just so nice and refreshing to see I had to share it with you.

Overall it's a very fun film, kind of a James Bond caper for kids. This is not surprising as the original story is by Ian Fleming the author of the Bond stories. There is some singing but it all fits in nicely with the story and the songs are mostly good and fun. One more refreshing part about CCBB is that it's not based on any cartoon or video game characters so you can actually show it to your kids without worrying about going out after and buying them all the officially licensed merchandise or McToys.

At 145 minutes it's a bit long but I recommend it highly. There is one particular character in it called the Child Catcher who, you guessed it, catches children. He is nothing but funny to adults but kids may find him genuinely creepy in the kind of way political correctness and social engineering have mostly eliminated from modern movies. Kids raised on Barny and Dora might find him quite scary. On that note, on to the game we go.

If you played along last time this will all be familiar to you. Below you will find twelve questions. The answers to the questions can be found in the movie. The answers will appear in the same order as the questions so there is no need to look for more than one answer at a time. Each answer will be a single digit number. The twelve questions will be lettered A through L. The answers when entered into the following format will become the latitude and longitude coordinates to a certain spot on the earth.

AB°CD'EF" North
GH°IJ'KL" East

You can then use Google Earth to locate the spot and find out what is there. You will need to have the "geographic web" layers selected/checked (at least the panoramio option) and then click on any of the little blue squares that appear at the location to find out just what is there. I don't have any prizes to give out this time so it will be just for the fun of playing. Please tell me the coordinates you come up with and what you find in the location by leaving a comment. Of course since the answer will appear there make sure you don't look at the comments until you are finished the game and/or are ready to check.

Here are the twelve questions:

A - How many sails/blades are there on the Potts' windmill? (Just to be clear, assume each sail ends at the center hub. In other words, you should count separately sails directly opposite each other extending out from the center on the same line.)

B - How many vertical wooden bars are there in the chair back of the chair Mr. Potts is sitting in when Edison first whistles through a candy?

C - How many kinds of treasure do Jeremy and Jemima have in their treasure chest?

D - How many pence was Caractacus charging for a haircut?

E - How many "change room" tents do they set up on the beach where they have their picnic?

F - Subtract 2 from the number of stones Truly steps on when she crosses the pond.

G - When the two spies meet grandpa Potts how many medals is he wearing on his chest?

H - Subtract 1 from the number of pockets on the billiard table seen when grandpa enters the castle.

I - How many "Jack-in-the-Boxes" does the Child Catcher open in the Toy Maker's basement?

J - When the Baron opens the trapdoor how many lit candles are there in the candle stand in the background?

K - When Chitty lifts off and leaves the castle how many people are in the car?

L - Add 3 to the number of buttons on the vest Lord Scrumptious is wearing in the Potts' home?

Good luck with the game, mostly though I hope you enjoy the movie. I'm so glad I rediscovered it after all these years. If you don't have a copy you can borrow mine if you're close enough. It's definitely worth renting or even buying. I think HMV has the full screen version going for $6 right now.